Friday, September 26, 2003

There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want." ~Calvin

so i'm back at work now. and as it was expected, i'm back here and it feels like i haven't missed a beat. i've been getting to work around 8:30 which is a change for me. i'm still very not in sync with any kind of a normal sleep schedule. i take 2 long naps daily...anywhere from 20 minutes to 2 hours. then i sleep for about 2-4 hours at night. with the naps, i can't go to sleep any sooner than 3:30. heck, on monday, i just skipped sleeping at night all together because i wanted to get to work on time. i guess if i fell asleep around 4, i would if i had to choice sleep in till about noon. and that wouldn't work. my work has been nice to me where i feel that i owe them big. but then again, if i had to do it again, i would have had all the reason to file worker's comp. next time i'll know better. maybe i need to take a proactive approach. i got some vicodine left, and maybe if i can stick it out without any naps...or at least only one small one, i can try to force myself to fall asleep at 12:00 or so.

i think generally, except my case currently (pain messed up my sleep schedule), the reason we are always fighting that snooze button is that we are always trying to do more than we have time for. and if your question is, "well, what do you do during that time?" my response is nothing the web, watch stuff on tv. what seems like stuff we do to kill time has more worth than most of us assume. if i had endless amount of time, i would like to reserve about 4-6 hours every day to just do stuff like suring the web, watching tv, or stare at the wall even. this is something i don't have time for. sleep is what i should be doing. sleep affects your life in every way possible, and not enough value is placed on that either. if we had 30 hour days maybe, life would be good for me.

so i got my tivo...i now record these programs:

American Idol

Road Rules

Real World

World Poker Tour

World Series of Poker




CSI: Miami



Law & Order: SVU

South Park


Outer Limits (not the original series)

Tales from the Crypt

Queer Eye for the Straight Guy

Date Patrol

Date Plate

Iron Chef

Tyler's Ultimate

A Cook's Tour

Good Eats

Forensic Files

Medical Detectives

Secrets of Forensic Science

New Detectives: A Case Study in Forensic Science

Cold Case Files

Myth Busters

I love Lucy

so a break down on stuff i watch are:



shows on major networks

alternate reality shows that have ended but i never got to see

self improvement/date shows


forensic science


even though its entirely possible that i'll watch all these shows, the thing about tivo is, its constantly saving whatever channel its tuned to anyway, even if i'm not going to watch it, it will always be tuned to something you'd rather be watching. so again, tivo manages your time better by letting you watch exactly what you want to and you'll never resort to channel surfing.

i also got 2 games through casey, now that he works at a division of Sony, he gets pretty awesome deals. i got socom with the head set, a PS2 network adapter, the getaway, and an extra dual shock controller 2 for an awesome deal. i only played socom just a little bit last night. i got creamed like i do in any FPS game that i'm not familiar with. i think i'm good with the controls, but it takes me a while to learn the maps...just like in real life. the network player will come in handy when gran turismo 4 comes out. oh yeah...can't wait for that. there are also 2 games coming out that is really interesting me. True Crime and Manhunt. True Crime is a game like grand theft auto...but i heard it's a big improvement from it. we'll have to wait and find out. but from GTA fans that have played it, they seem to be really impressed. Manhunt is the next revolutionary game from Rock Star...from the division that brought you Grand Theft Auto. what is interesting is that they are pretty close to the release date on this game but they haven't said anything about what this game is about. an interesting approach. i hope it doesn't disappoint like state of emergency. its kinda like how segway was was a rumor that it was a single human transport that hovered on air. man, it was dissappointing to find out that it had wheels. according to wendy, it looks like for regular consumers, it is turning out to be only a recreational vehicle. speaking of segways:

segway recall

Friday, September 19, 2003

its official

i'm returning to work on monday. actually looking forward to it. the nurses were amazed at my progress, even though i'm still wondering why i'm in pain and taking pain killers. still got a bit of sciatic pain, but the nurse said that's normal and its gonna take a while. she hopes maybe in a month i'll be much better.
russian spam

how in the world did i get signed up for this? can't read a damn word so i what's the use? i have yet to see spanish spam. but russian spam?

met up with eric, travis at sushi ota yesterday. sushi was awesome. pricey but worth it. standing and waiting outside for 15 minutes was killer on my sciatic pain. can't really concentrate on any on going conversations when pain is at that level. after dinner eric and i made a detour to extrodinary deserts. desert was good. chairs kinda sucked. i think by the end of the night i hit my limit on what my body can handle at the moment. i had to take some vicodin eventually to calm it down. it felt pretty good getting out and soaking up some atmosphere and familiar smells. extrodinary deserts seemed like a great date place. but would i enjoy the experience?

i just realized something. one thing i don't like about going on dates is that things like going out to dinner and stuff like that feels so cliche and unoriginal. its just so in contrast of what i would like the other person to think of what i am about. i would like to be more original and creative if i could be. sure i like eating great food. i do want to get to know them better. maybe i'm just too self conscious of myself. and that prevents me from just letting go and having fun. i am 25 and i feel like i have so much to learn about life.

Tuesday, September 16, 2003

a few quick updates

i probably won't be putting together a thing to celebrate my recovery. for a few reasons. one being is that the recovery process is slow going and gradual. so it will be really hard to declare when i am fully recovered. i just know that i have a bit of recovery to do. but that doesn't mean i'm still stuck at home. i've been getting out and doing stuff almost every day. i gone to eat out a few times, boba a few times, and just hanging out at friend's houses. i'll probably just take time to see friends semi individually. there will always be next year.

i bought a 80 hour tivo for about $235 shipped (350 - 15% off - 30 coupon - $50 rebate, no tax/free shipping). i figure life is all about maximizing your time on doing what you want to do. with a tivo, i watch all the tv i really want to watch, watch none of the stuff i would just watch because its just being aired and i'm bored, and waste no time watching commercials. even if i end up watching a few hours more of tv per week, i still would have used that time more wisely than watching 3 less hours of tv and having only spent some of that time watching what you really wanted to watch.

i had one of those amazing dreams last night. somehow i was with this gourgeous long haired brunette girl with a perfect tan, my height, with a perfect body. and for some reason, she was naked and i was walking her to her work where she worked as a masseuse. it didn't really progress too much further than that but maybe now that the pain has died down, i can sleep deeper and have these vivid dreams. she was GBD. gold, brown, and delicious. ;)

man, i just realized they didn't card me for alcohol today! damn it! how can they tell? i don't look like i got any older... i bought a bottle of white wine to cook with...gonna stew these large mushrooms i got at costco in red pasta sauce, white wine, basil, bay leaves, and ground beef. was gonna use meatballs, but i didn't want to go to costco to buy them.

Saturday, September 13, 2003

its scary out there

since i've been living in pretty much a plastic bubble in the last 6 months, i've been pretty fortunate to only catch one cold (probably from a doctor's visit). but yesterday, i went to get boba with casey and today i woke up with a mild headache and some sinus irritation. maybe i'm just paranoid but i hope i'm not coming down with anything.

i finished the 2 websites i've been working on:

Active Directory

Exchange 2000 and BlackBerry

as with any new project, i learned a great deal. like how to pull multiple sources of html and its limitations so i can just worry about editing one menu bar, one pull down menu, etc. i learned how to use slices in photoshop, inline frames, how to remove the scroll bar. for example the Exchange 2000 page's real URL is you wouldn't know it unless you look at the URL that doesn't change....and i can even hide that if i wanted to.

going to costco today to get new contacts and contact Rx. i was thinking of getting the laser eye surgery, but i think i'll just do one surgery at a time. plus i heard that you lose some clarity cause of the scar tissue. so i'm gonna have to do some research...maybe in a year or so.

Wednesday, September 10, 2003

one step at a time

i spent about 6 hours today trying to figure out why in the world after form tags an extra line appears. i was trying to circumvent the problem by using inline frames but i decided i wasn't going to compremise so i looked into the problem more. i turns out that it is a very nagging feature that a lot of people have come across. the solution is here.

i've been working for about a week on a new design of our new website. this time i finally decided to do the thing where the page pulls the html off other pages so that if i wanted to update the menu for example, i would only need to edit one html file, not every html file on the website.

new website template

after work (from home still), casey came over and we went to go eat tofu. it was probably the longest i had sat since my injury. about 40 minutes and it fel like i had done a few set of squats at the gym. after that, i decided to catch up on the dvd's i've been meaning to buy since my injury. so we went to best buy and i picked up simpsons season 3, family guy volume 2, harry potter 2, and dave chapelle's killing me softly. then the started setting in. so we needed to head back. at least the pain seems to come later and is just a little bit more bearable every 2 days.

i have a follow up on the 19th with my doctor. hopefully he'll see everything is up and up with me and will be able to sign the form that will let me return to work. so i'll hopefully be returning to work on the 22nd. I'll probably be putting together a get together on the 20th or the 27th to celebrate my recovery and missed birthday.

Monday, September 8, 2003

things are looking up and up

saturday, i woke up with very noticable improvement on the pain. for the first time in 6 months, i could stand straight up without any pain. tommy came by again this weekend so i ate out for the first time since my injury. we went to this thai place called saffron. i've been there twice previously. first time was an okay experience. second time was good. the third time (this weekend) was horrible. my spicy drunken noodles had this pungent smell of licorice (not a big fan) and the salad rolls (aka spring rolls everywhere else) were frozen on the inside. and the shrimp they gave us seemed like rehydrated mini shrimp you get in the cheap salad. basically i'm never going there again. awful.

sunday, to my surprise, i was even better than the day before, and finally decided to get a haircut. pic here. another thing i noticed when i woke up was that my skin was really good for some odd reason, so i thought it was a good sign to do some grooming.

the guy that cuts my hair was pretty shocked to hear that i hadn't cut my hair in 6 months, and even more surprised when he saw me in person. anyway, he is the hair stylist that i had to track down after he quit manivonne's hair design (fka benzhair). so he moved to fantastic sams a couple of blocks away. and he called me about 5 months ago saying that he had his own place now. even a bit further time time. it took about 25 minutes of sprited driving to get there. on my way back, i thought i'd stretch its legs and hit 100 for a little while. high speed driving will still take some getting used to.

after that, i went to JV's with tommy and got the surf and turf burriton. probably the biggest and best value burrito money can buy. but there is something weird about their ingredients because after i eat that burrito, it feels like i've taken some really good pain killers and i usually take a nice siesta for about an hour or so. after tommy left, i took a nap then went to ralphs...which i haven't done since the injury. and its just one of my things to do after hours shopping at ralphs. it feels like i am not limited to just getting items on the list. i enjoy cruising the halls and looking at and comparing the products. before i got injured i probably averaged going to ralphs 3 times a week, most of the times after midnight.

strangely, but as it was expected, when i do things that i missed doing, i don't find greater pleasure in it even though i still enjoy it. it's like the hair. i had the longest hair i've ever, and now that i've got rid of it, it has been 12 hours and it feels like that's all far off in the past. as much as i miss being at work, i think i'll get there and realize there wasn't not too much there for me to be missing. this whole mass social surrounding that we often feel so addicted to sometimes is really not there for me anymore. doesn't mean i'm not looking forward to some things, but i no longer feel like i need to be out just to change my social atmosphere. what i'm going to be looking for are more meaningful experiences and make the most out of my time. now what is that? beats me. maybe i'll put more focus on my future.

another thing that happened today was that the last of the stitch has fallen off and the incision looks like its healing nicely. i'm still having trouble walking, and trying to keep my spine straight. there is still definitely a lot of pain if i get in the right position. i definitely still have more healing to do. still can't celebrate yet because i still feel injured. things have improved enough to get me to schedule my next follow up so that they can sign the paper that will let me return to work and find out what's going on with my physical therapy appointments.

Thursday, September 4, 2003

i'm about 3+ weeks into post op, and i'd say things are slowly getting better. noticing some new pain so that's kinda concerning me, and less pain where there used to be pain. but today, i just had no urge to take the vicodine. i'm sure it would have been teensy bit better without it, but i really didn't feel like i needed it at all today which is quite different compared to how i felt every day since and before surgery. i'm still taking neurontin though. i don't think i have been walking around as much as i should be...turns out lying in bed all day just lengthens the recovery time. so i've been trying to get around a little bit. i actually made my first public outing on Sunday...went to Fry's with my dad. i was almost starting to limp while walking back to the car. i guess the pain had a lot to do with it, but i just wanted to get the stuff and get the hell out of there. i didn't regret or enjoy the trip.

on Monday, I actually decided to pick up the medication on my own, and i was able to do it without feeling like i was forcing myself and putting strain on my body when i could have had a friend pick it up for me.

today, i walked to vons, and wow, i guess i haven't used my legs in a while but my legs felt like i had done a few sets of squats at the gym by just walking about 2 blocks back and fourth.

the labor day weekend was okay. everyone pretty much came over for a good hour or two on my birthday. that was cool. my family came over...and to my surprise actually slept over. this was the first time my parents had closed for an entire day along with closing early on a non holiday ever since they owned a business....about 15 years maybe? i enjoyed their visit and all but my dad is so...what's the word inhospitable? well for one, he is a mirror image of homer simpson. he's loud, irrational, a slob, inconsiderate, egotistical reasoning, thinks he knows how to do everything when he actually can't seem to do anything right. the perfect example was when he was over this weekend, my brother poured my dad a glass of coke, and it was about 1/3 coke, 2/3 froth, and he tries to show us how a professional pours cokes into glasses using some kind of a pour trick where the bottle head is inserted into a glass upside down. long story short, he spilled coke everywhere and all of us had a good laugh for a minute or two (even though i was biting my tongue the whole time trying to not laugh because it hurt my back). another my apartment, with the door swung open, he decides to get comfortable and takes off his shirt and hangs around in his boxers. did i mention his physique is of homer as well? on top of my roommate being home this weekend, my apartment's door faces directly opposite of the stairs where everyone coming up to the third floor has a good chance to stare into the apartment while they walk up the stairs. i always thought my dad had a lot of wisdom but i'm not too sure anymore. maybe i just never listened too closely to his arguements when i was growing up, or maybe my dad is going senile, but his arguments are repetitive crap. he was trying to explain how to buy houses to make money and he just kept repeating what he was trying to get across over and over without giving anything more than circular reasoning. has he been like this all the time?

my brother is a loud snorer, but he's got nothing on my dad. according to my brother it sounded so loud that he thought my dad was faking it to wake people up. while he was sleeping, i could hear the snores from the living room to my bedroom. with the door closed. when i first heard it, i first though to my self, " couldn't be." gotta give it to my mom for being able to put up with that. i think i snore from time to time too, but i've been told it's not the type of snore that keeps people from being able to sleep. unless i'm having a hard time breating due to sinus congestion or something at that time. it would be a safe bet to say my mom is a lot like marge. she puts up with unimaginable crap, and does everything i would expect from a perfect mom. its a disrespectful thing to say but i think my mom could have done a lot better. anyways homer has his good qualities too just like my dad. he has sacrificed everything for his family and he's still giving his 100% for his family.