i think WB underminds the potential of smallville. so they make stupid episode like whatever that crap was on tuesday. and then "let's throw in some new top ten songs this week." they should hire some real talent, rather than working with the basic formula.

i've been playing grand theft auto vice city last 2 days. it is a very well developed game. i can't help but admit to a little disappointment. when i first bought grand theft auto 3, it soon became clear that it was one of the best games that i ever played. just realizing you can just cause all the mayham with all the destructive devices known to man was an eye opening experience. and it kept me entertained for a good 2 months. what i was really seeking with the purchase of GTA: VC was that eye opening experience, but also an experience that will top what i got from GTA3. unfortunately you can't reinvent the wheel when you are making the same game underneath with all the enhancements one could wish that GTA3 had (which GTA Vice City provides). if i had never played GTA3, and played GTA vice city first, then it would have been that experience that I was seeking for. other than disappointment from that point of view, it is an awesome game. the best thing about GTA3 was that you were free to cause any mayham that you can think of. Vice City will let you do that with more than 2x amount of weapons, vehicles, general character mobility, and city space (and tons of more added features). and with all these additions, it is more possible to make anything possible. it has been awarded ratings that no game has ever given before. and i'm sure it shattered just about any video game presale and sale records. can't wait to see everything that the game has to offer.

i had a horrible nightmare before i woke up this morning. it's like one of those dreams that everyone talks about when you walk to school and you realize you're naked or something. well, that's not one of my worst fears, but these dreams generally are all about your biggest fears and insecurities. the following (what i drempt about) is my version of that dream:



i went to bed thinking...."i gotta wake up early little little amount of sleep so that i can get sophos enterprise manager installed before our exchange meeting at 1pm."



in my dream, i find myself in Gardena at my parent's place in the dining room of the Monday we're supposed to have this meeting. and it's already 1:01pm. so obviously i'm not at work. and time is already run out. and i can't even go to the meeting because i'm about 110 miles away. it looks like i have given up, or cracked under pressure and ran to somewhere i feel more secure in a general sense. my dad is there, but says nothing. he accepts my defeat under pressure, and he's there to tell me that it's okay. that might seem like a nice gesture to anyone, but it is part of my nightmare (i'll explain this in a little bit). so i call erik on my cell phone and he asks me what's going on. and i crack under pressure and can't give him a phony excuse that i'm not feeling well. so i just tell him everything. not the way i feel. but just where i am, and how i don't have an excuse not to be at the meeting other than how stress has broken me. the phone conversation ends by him saying, "we'll need to talk about this tomorrow." as i hung up, i have realized that i've eaten about 3-4 french toast/pastry just drenched in butter and covered in sugar (and maybe chocolate) and just about to eat another one before i caught myself. the sad thing is i was preparing these myself while i was on the phone, and eating these one by one. and the dream ends when i realize how i just about fucked up everything good i had going at the time.



this dream is awful for me in so many ways. the fact that i had admited defeat the first time on something as important as work is a nightmare on its own. the part of my dad telling me that it's okay that i messed up is a dagger to my heart because it's his way of saying, "i expected you to fail." i always hated that about my dad. and lastly, the food thing. what the hell was that about? i do consider nutrition my #1 priority. so it makes sense that i am that conscious about fucking it up one of these days, and eventually caving into binging on junk food. at least i don't see that happening. no reason to. and i don't even crave that kind of stuff any more. kinda ironic that nguyen just about missed the exchange meeting because he was grabbing lunch and forgot about the meeting. i also accomplished everything i was stressing about the night before with relative ease. i guess in reality, there was never anything to stress about. the exchange meeting wasn't all that important to where my job wasn't dependent on it. and i would never accidentally eat 5000 calories of simple sugars and fats without noticing.



am i that complicated or is this how everyone is?

sad....juke joint cafe is closing. i admit it's not the best place to eat (food was mediocre at best), but its a great place to eat if you want a live jazz band. oh well. damn those neighbors. where is the mafia when you need them?

http://sandiego.citysearch.com/profile/249910

even though it sure wasn't one of the most boring weekends, it was one of the most uneventful ones. last few weekends were pretty hectic (even though it was also fun). it seemed like i was in and out the door and never got much rest, so this weekend was just what i needed.



friday, i got home from the gym around 7:30, met up with ray and mat, got some sushi at tadashi, walked around a little because we all had way too much to eat, especially me. then we went to go see....aw damn...you know a movie is bad when you have absolutely no recollection of it, especially if you saw the movie about 48 hours ago.......................................truth about charlie! that's the one. yeah, it was okay. the original with cary grant and audrey hepburn supposedly was a lot better. we rode in mat's RSX (automatic), and it seemed like a pretty fun car to drive. the back seats were peculiar. it had these unremovable plastic inserts that would just about shatter your tailbone if you sat in the middle. as mat put it, "they put that as an excuse to not have a 3rd seat in the back". and it was exactly that.



saturday, i vegged out at home. slept all that i could, and woke up around 1 after a few naps. i had planned to get dinner with jeff, but we both changed our minds. i played about 40 minutes of ddr and i realized that i still had it. played mostly 5 foots, and did 6 and 7 foots. i find the 5 feets most enjoyable. you can actually incorporate some dance moves without it feeling like it's just a test of your techinical abilities. i also wore my heart rate monitor and found that 5 feet songs were perfect for the fat burning range (120bpm), and 6-7 feet were good for cardiovascular exercise (150bpm).



i finally made it to the gym after 5, did my thing, and got back home around 7. cooked some dinner (green beans, spinach, chicken in one dish, and just seared salmon in the other). tommy gave me the guilt trip about not joining his fantasy basketball league, so i finally did. i managed to pick up shaq, iverson, and MJ. not bad eh?



sunday, slept in. woke up and got pho with jeff. i had to go pick his ass up because he didn't want to drive his GTR and the truck and wagon were being used by his parents. jeff put a hole the size of a standard nail head on his hood because he dropped his club on it. being made of fiberglass and carbon fiber, it wasn't forgiving and just cracked a big hole. man, knowing how jeff cares about the car, i wouldn't be surprised if he went home to go weap into a sofa cusion for a few hours. i remember my first nick in my paint, and i was heart broken for about 3 days. jeff on the other hand, has about 1000x more concern for the exterior for his car. can't imagine what he must have went through. the good thing is that the replacement hood becomes factory painted. which is all that he can pray for. but the bad thing is its gonna cost $3K. the size of a beater you can drive into the ground. you can always get bondo and patch it up and paint it, but this is jeff we're talking about. he already has the hood ordered i bet. there might be some buyers for the hood so maybe it's not a complete loss. he sold the vspec ii, and it is pretty certain it went to paul walker. especially because the buyer's agent had to come out to CA and buy it for him because the guy is in Florida filming (where FF2 is supposedly being filmed.) little does he know there is already a vspec nur here. but who knows, FF2 is supposed to glorify vspec 2's and he might even prefer it.



anyways, went to go get pho, and then we got boba. walked over to Pacific Honda, and looked at the new 2003 Accords. the 2003 Coupe was nice. refined here and there. but some things looked a little cheap too. like the gages looked super generic. something radioshack would sell if they sold gages. the knobs were a little weird too on the doors, but on the other hand, the radio controls were really refined, felt really sturdy and classy. sat in the manual, and the shifter felt really good. i always phantasize how good it feels to actually drive one, and when i finally get in, it feels good, but i realize how much work it takes compared to an automatic. still not 100% sure i want a stick. maybe SMG type transmission is the way to go. hopefully it will make its way into more vehicles. right now, bmw m3's, and upcoming mr2's are the ones with it (ferraris and porches don't count because i can't afford one on the cars the put it on). one thing they don't have and they won't have for a while is the 2003 Accord Coupe V6 with the manual transmission. the dealer told me around january, but another dealer told me june or july.



then we walked over to the Infinity lot. they still haven't gotten their G35 coupes yet. he said they should have them in about 2 weeks. and the demand is high. they have about 8 dealers, and supposedly, they each have about 40 customers that are set to buy. another interesting thing he mentioned was that only 2% of the cars manufactured was a manual. i asked why it was so low, and he said that's about right for the denad. out of all the people that has preordered, only 3 of them were manuals.



then i got back into my car, and realized i'm pretty lucky to drive what i drive. some people are dreaming of driving what i'm currently driving, and mine is already completely paid for, while they eagerly sign to sweat out the payments. i think i'll drive it for 4 more years. so i got back home, went to the gym at 6:30, hoping to make it home by 8 and catch the better half of the world series. but damn, i must have read it wrong on cnnsi's page. i thought the game started at 7, but it actually started at 5. while i was typing to tommy wondering how the innings went so fast, the last hitter was out and the game was over. i missed the whole damn thing.



the longer i work out, the more i understand how my body really works. every day, i'm fine tuning my routine by incorporating just about everything i know so that i do everything correctly, get the right amount of rest, and change it up just at the right time. there are so many conflicting advice and ideas out there, but i realized that these people don't necessarily have bad info, but it only applies to one type of training you might doing. eventually, i think i'll get certified and write a book about everything because it's obvious that even some trainers are confused about all information out there and how and when to correctly apply it.



i finally understand the idea of cutting up. i've realized that my approach was all wrong. i didn't like the fact that i lost weight after i went below 160, and i've been eating more just to keep my weight up, even when i'm cutting up. and i realized how stupid that is. when explained, it is something that should have been common sense, but i had just realized just the other day how it really worked. half the process of cutting up is in fatloss.



the way your body burns the stored fat is when your body seeks an energy source that your daily intake of food isn't providing. when i give it exactly what it needs to burn, i am just wasting my time at the gym. i'm only working off the foods i consume, and doing pretty much nothing to the stored fat in my body. what i need to do is have a caloric deficiency, so that after it has burned everything that i consumed, it goes to the fat stores. it isn't cut and dry to where my body will only burn stored fat if i have a deficiency in consumed fat for the day, but it is pretty close. so i am expected to lose weight when i'm cutting up. the weight i'll lose will be from the weight in the loss of fat and unfortunately muscle. and you have to lift to preserve muscle while you're cutting up.



when you are building muscle, especially if you are low in body fat, you need to expect to gain weight. if you have some fat to give, you can still build and maintain some weight, but even though it is not as inefficient was trying to cut up and maintain your weight, you can pack on more muscle if you consume more and gain weight. your goal from here on will be to minimize the fat you'll gain. you can minimize this by controlling your carb intakes. only time to eat more carbs than usual is breakfast and post workout. and for a post work out meal, it will be benefiscial to eat simple carbohydrates rather than complex carbos.



other news. i finally got around to getting 512 more megs (now 768 megs) of PC133 ram to my other computer. now it's fast. it was sucking real bad before where there was about 1-2 second lag on just about anything i tried to do. i'm happy now. and only $50.

so i didn't make it to the gym today? hmmm...was that the first time in 7.5 months? anyways, i had so many reason not to go. first off, my adductors are in serious need of rest. i feel like every step i take, someone is stabbing me in both of my thighs. plus, nguyen's taking time off of best buy this week just to catch a breather. and how often does that happen? so we hung out today and watched mr deeds with joe. mr deeds had some funny parts, and some weird parts......funny like "where the hell did they come from?" funny. if my thighs feel good, i'm gonna try to make up my routine tomorrow, and also work my biceps and back. if i don't have time, i think i'll just have to make it to rimac on saturday which might not be a bad idea.

man, where did the hours go? what is the phrase that says everything works against everything good? it's kinda like irony...but it makes sense too.



like for example, time flies when you're having fun.

time goes by slowly when you wish it would pass.



today i come to work, with having a bunch of work to do, not much gets done and it's almost time to leave. it wasn't even a fun day at work. time just flew. yes, i understand the irony that i'm writing this at work.



i wonder what is worse.

a) having the passion to do something, anything, but not knowing what to be passionate about?

or b) doing things you are passionate about but it costing you loads of money.



my achilles heel is my dvd collection. even though it is not the primary cause for my massive credit card debt, it still has contributed considerably. i think i'm managing pretty well with limiting my purchases......except for dvds. my guidelines on deciding for what to buy is pretty high, but for some reason, they have been releasing a lot of things that i've been waiting for.

some smallville stuff today.



http://www.sfgate.com/tvradio/nielsens/

major spoiler alert. i regret reading some of it. oh well.

http://www.thesmallvilletorch.com/spoilers/?show=episodic



67 in the nielsens ratings! they broke 100 just about 7 weeks ago.

man, my thigh muscles (aductors or abductors?) are soooo fricking sore i have to walk funny. and on top of that i did 45 min of cardio...i think i went overboard. maybe i should have rested. i hope they are well by tomorrow. i went to nguyen's house tonight. he cooked up some ribeyes for everyone, and i had some skinless chicken. how thoughtful! although i ate definitely way too much. after that, we just chilled for a bit, talking about govenment conspiracies with nguyen's friend who came down from san bernandino.



this has been one of the busiest weeks so far this quarter. and it there is no sign of it letting up. i should get there early tomorrow. try to do more work.



amd's throwing one of those motherboard/cpu giveaways again. they'll be in SD this tuesday, at the night this time. i think i'll be there and watch small ville on tape. still have to think about it though. my cpu's are fast enough. its the ram that's killing me. maybe i'll get some tomorrow during lunch.

nothing much went on today. i was surprised to find out that the more dense foam inserts for my ignition pads had already been delivered. not by ups ground, but by airborne express. wow, free too. and they didn't skimp on the free carrying cases i was supposed to get if i had paid. the inserts are really dense. as dense as taking the foam out all together and playing on really short carpet. and it didn't fit quite that well. had to really stretch to get it on there, but i managed to fit both in. they performed about 10x better than the original foam, but it's not a total solution to the flaw of the pads. it just lets me play longer, as if i was playing on carpet without the foam. so, yes, it's a significant improvement. and that's about as much as you can do with those flawed pads. after a while, you will see the same symptoms, but it won't be as bad.



so i played about 30 minutes of DDR, then i realized how much i was sweating....like i hadn't sweated in a long time.......there must be something to DDR and sweat glands. the jumping must make the sweat glands go over time. for my body at least. i didn't want to over-do it because i was planning on going to rimac at 8, doing my chest and tri workout with 45 min of fat burn low intensity cardio. there is definitely less people this week at rimac, but still pretty bad.



today, i had some korean ramen, and damn, that's some really unhealthy stuff. first off, one packet of ramen lists nutritional facts as 2-4 servings. the one i had today listed the nutritional facts as it should be for 4 servings per container. but totally erased the "4" number off the nutritional facts. just erased it right off of there. it's pretty damn illegal on what they are doing. they know that the nutritional facts are really that bad. it has more sodium than one should eat in a day, about 80g of carbs, 18g of fat, and 12g protein per packet. divide that up in 4 servings, and the numbers don't look too bad. and hide the "4" and people think its actually pretty good for them because they think its only 1 serving. and to think i used to eat 2 of these at a time when i got hungry. oh, someone shoot me now. so anyways, i ate it as 2 different servings, with some extra protein on the side. i tried to get home from the gym as soon as possible to catch the show csi-miami. but on the way home, i had to stop by albertsons, and get gas, and i got home around 10:40. the show looked mildly appealing to me at best, but it's the only thing i have. what i really want is the real show like foresic files, or autopsy, but csi will have to do because i don't have cable.

i set up a web calendar http://cartman.lucidera.com. unfortunately, as i type this connection to roadrunner from UCSD is shot, so i cannot make too much changes. i'll play with colors and background later.



my ddr ignition pads have been collecting in dust because i kinda got tired of just trying to play with the problems it had. the company that made them have come out with better foam inserts, and i ordered 2 for $54 after shipping and left them the comment.



"i bought 2 first versions of ignition pads from you guys, and after about a week, they were almost unusable. I sent you guys a detailed description, and you never got back. I'm spending another $54.30 for 2 foam inserts + shipping and hoping for a miracle. You guys should give these out for free to people who have purchased the very flawed ignition pads (first version)."



and they actually got back to me and said they will not be charging me for the inserts or the shipping. that was good news to hear this morning. i'm gonna guess that it's not gonna solve the problem with the pads, but it should extend some play time before the pads start failing. also good news because DDR MAX for PS2 is coming just around the corner.

the weekend was pretty crazy.

friday, andrew, kat, kat's friend dawn, kat's bf thomas, and tommy came to sleep over for the air show. we went to tapioca express for some boba. jeff joined us there, and to everyone's surprise he drove the GTR. so after boba, he mesmorized everyone with his car. he's got bright red racing seats in them now. supposedly really high end best seats you can buy in japan. he did a half donut as he drove home.



on saturday, raymond and his friend diana joined us for the day. we went to Easy J's for lunch, then drove to the air show. we decided to take 15N there, but ran into some crazy traffic on the bridge.





the backup was on miramar way, and if we had waited there, it would have easily been extra couple hours in line. we got off miramar rd instead, parked at acapulco, and walked 2 miles in. we got there before the other car who parked on base. we couldn't have been more lucky because once we were walking in Fat Albert was taking off, and the blue angels were up next. the blue angels were amazing. if these guys did missions too, watch out. they are what harlem globetrotters are to basketball.





























we met up with my torrance friends danny, rick, and danny's friend hiro. we just walked around for a bit and they took off before we did.





after the air show, we went to go eat at taste of thai in del mar.





food was awesome as usual. after that, we went to get boba at tapioca express, then went to pacific town square to watch knockaround guys. the movie was a B movie at best. it's something you catch late night on hbo that you've never seen before. after we got home, tommy decided to drive home that night. kat, thomas, and diana left in the morning. they woke me up while i was still asleep in bed. andrew was up a little later, and we got brunch at the broken yolk cafe. it was my first time there. food was good, but it was a lot. it was equivalent of 3 of my meals. after brunch, andrew left, and i had food coma. tried to stay awake as i watched the movie saturday night fever. amazingly got through the movie without dozing off for more than a few seconds, but took a nap right after. woke up around 6:50, and met up wendy at the main gym at 7:20 to do 45 minutes of cardio exercise. that concludes my weekend.



i am about 95% recovered from my cold. this one was a brutal one. the symptoms weren't all too bad. but the cold lasted for a good 1.5 weeks, and i still have throat congestion. exactly 8 days from Grand Theft Auto Vice City. can't wait. i reserved a copy at electronics boutique. this should guarentee that i stay home on the weekdays. time to get my playstation back from wei.

today wasn't just a normal day that came and went. oh no. i actually have something funny to blog about. today was, Ant Day. what is Ant Day you ask?



well, at about midnight, i realized my collection of pants had really grown. considering i only actively wear 3 pants right now (all jeans, all ever so slightly different), but have about 30 stacked up, i decided to throw some away, and picked ones to give to my dad so he can use it to have fun and "practice" on his 80's style commercial sewing machine (i'll maybe elaborate on that in the future.) so i'm sorting through. i realize, wow, damn, i own a lot of khakis and khaki shorts. and they all don't appeal to me right now. so i piled them on the bed. and i pick up a pair, and notice some black dust.....almost like ant droppings.....but no ants in sight. could be just dirt. so i dismissed it as that. and i get to the last pair of pants, and i look under it, and i wonder "what are these........FUCK! ANTS!!!" About 100-200 on one side of the pants. in a panic, i threw it back on my bed, and i had realized, how stupid that was. immediately put the ant pants in the trash. and i see tiny red spots moving on my navy blue bed sheet. so i grab the lint roller, and the lint roller rips apart (last 2 sheets). so i dab the bedsheet with the last remaining layers of the ant roller, collect about 3-400 ants or so. problem solved? wrong.



i thought the ants hive was sandwiched between 2 pairs of pants, but realized i only found one pants with ants. then i had a terrible realization where they could have come from. i've had a ant problem in my closet/office all year. i thought they were all gone because i hadn't seen much of them lately because of the cold weather, boy was i wrong. i look at the part of the closet where the pants were lifted from, and i discover the hive. i lift some of the other stack, and i see a few drones. so i go for the ant & roach raid.





spray it up real good. only takes a little bit, but i'm impatient, and i don't want them to excape to my shirts. so i douse them. it says "unscented", but damn, this stuff is intoxicating. can barely breathe when that stuff gets sprayed. the end result. unfortunately the drones were not to be found. the red dots are a collection of ants and whatever the ants hatched out of.





so i decided to move all my clothes, except my socks to the living room.





as you can see, my closet has been cleared out for the time being.





and about 30 minutes later, after i thought i had defeated the ants for good, i discover more ants in between my new clothes. in between my 2 most expensive pairs of pants. and wow, the ants must know quality when they see it, or the 8 yr old must have been sucking on a lolipop and drooling while sewing the BR pants in some 3rd world country, because the real hive was in my nicest pair of pants, that i don't even wear. not on the outside. the inside. no lint roller was gonna take care of this one, and it was even beyond the spray's reach. it was time to drown them in the tub. and the ants were in the thousands. about 10 drones....still no queen in sight........kinda creepy. hopefully she went down the drain with the other drones.



as you can see, even the pockets are made of the same material as the pants. now that's class. i think i've redefined the term "got ants in your pants." these pants are going in the laundry tomorrow, pronto.



why did they have a hive over there? these are super ants. they don't need food or water. they only need dust and moisture to survive. and these guys didn't even have that, and they seemed to manage just fine. i'm just gonna let the office/closet fumigate over night, and hopefully that should be enough to kill some additional ants in hiding. tired, needed to have gone to sleep long ago.



other news, i had a dinner with OG ResNet today. Erik couldn't make it was usual. I had something pretty healthy. chicken florentine. not too horribly tasty. chicken was a bit dry. i felt like i ate too much, and then i came home and i got hungry. only fat on that chicken was the olive oil that the vegetables were sauteed in.

well, i realize now that i did go a little overboard with the ephedra (aka hydroxycut). i was boarderline of taking too much, and i know that if i ever do take it again just to finish the 2/3 of the bottle left over, i'm definitely gonna take less. less than 1/2 of the max dose i was taking. 99.99% sure i'll probably never buy another supplement other than creatine and glutamine. while i was taking hydroxycut i did cut out all cardio, and i had lost all sight of what i had lost, which was all the benefits of being healthy. the clarity of mind, and the refreshing feeling of waking up in the morning, necessity to sleep less, and the feeling that you are physically capable of anything (like running a mile at a snap of a finger) was all gone. i'm back on track with my cardio, and from just doing the cardio again for a short amount of time (and without the ephedra), i'm up to capacity again.

i think i can figure out people pretty well. but one person i can't seem to figure out at all is my dad.



he's

65% homer simpson

20% homer the philosopher

15% pure insane



the percentages fluctuate over the years.



he always means well. not an ounce of selfishness when it comes to material posessions, but one of the most selfish people i know when it comes to what he wants for his children. he's never grown out of egocentric thinking that we are born with. my mom on the other hand is the direct opposite of my dad. good listener, never selfish, gives good advice, never overbaring, and realistic.



my dad's latest thing is dining tables. he's bought a whole bunch of them. we now have 8 in the apartment. 3 in the living room, one in the kitchen, 3 upstairs, and one in the storage room. the large 3 bedroom apartment that my parents live in suddenly became crowded overnight. his explanation was that once the children have our own place, he'll give each of us dining tables. i guess since there are only 4 different houses we can live in at a given time (me, my bro, my sis, and my parents), he expects each of us to take 2? my mom said at least he has a hobby and he enjoys what he does (for now, it is collecting dining tables. next time i go home, who knows, we might have 10+). we shouldn't try to take that little pleasure away from him because he does nothing for himself. she's right.

finally. its been fixed.

blogger.com is having some serious trouble.

a day of 187's



i checked cnn today, and it said that confirmed dead in a night club in bali was 187. more to come.

i was reading travis' blog, and he said he bowled 187.

watching royal tanenbaums today, and one sons made a request to borrow exactly 187 dollars.



kinda odd. i ran into it once more today, but can't remember where. as you know that number is the police code for homicide.

i haven't downloaded any music in a few months. here are 4 that i've added to my mp3 collection:



The Calling - Whnever You Will Go

(all i think about is smallville when i'm listening to this show, and that is fine by me)

Jack Johnson - Bubble Toes

(just a fun song)

No Doubt - Underneat It All

(sounds like something that could have come from her much earlier albums. she does have one of the most amazing voices.)

Bad Religion - The Defense

(sounds like a song that is as fun to play as it is to listen.)





i need to get down to business on paying back my credit cards. i've made rules for myself and need to do it for a year



-eat all the excess vacuum packed protein i've accumulated in my fridge, and cabinets.

-don't spend any money on lunch, unless i forget to bring it from home during workdays.

-no eating out or boba on the weekdays, including sunday night, except for special occasions. birthdays, holidays, etc. i'll also limit this budget to $100/month.

-no beef jerky (this used to be a serious chunk of my food expenses believe it or not)

-cancelling the phone service

-no new clothes (that's okay. i also have about $145 in gift cards to use)

-no agressive driving (gonna be tough)

-budget of gadets, software, and dvd's, i'll give myself $50 a month

-refill water bottles



i need to do all this without making any adjustments on healthy balanced meals.





here's my amateur analysis of the sniper.

they keep mentioning "geographic profiling". it was a cool technique when it first came out, but with about 12 different forensic science tv shows, everyone knows its simplicity and you can basically create a geographic hotspot just knowing the basic rules of geographic profiling and really throw off the geographic profilers. i'm not sure why they are basing so much emphasis on that. obviously this guy is smarter than that. just look at his kills. his first group of people he has killed were more planned out. it wasn't random. the sniper has demonstrated that:

they'll kill one to a few a day.

any age.

any race

any location (your home to a public area like a gas station).



i think that was their statement when you just look at the killings the first few days. now that they got that message across, the killing have turned random. i think the kids thing was to just prove a point. so i don't think we should worry about more kids falling victim.



the whole thing about the tarrot card (did i even spell that right?), tells me that even though he might be clever, he's not a mastermind. the Death card doesn't represent death at all. obviously he's not a simpsons fan. the cute bunny means death.

well, i've been flaking on writing out the highlights of my days.

wednesday, i had dinner with wendy. cooked salmon, then stir fried some chicken, green beans, and spinach in soy sauce, olive oil, and pepper. food was great. bummer she couldn't stay too long after dinner because she had to run to the lab to do a programming assignment.

on thursday, i took diem out to pampas for her birthday. food was wonderful as usual. we both got bife de lomo especial. after that we went to get boba at tapioca express. the line was extremely long, so basically we hung out in the line, got our drinks and left. there were 2 nsx's there, and a e46 m3. i've realized how taking friends out to dinners is one of the best gift options. instead of spending too much time buying something they might not like, why not spend that time with that person during dinner?

friday i woke up with a cold. i went to diem's party with raymond and jeff. we stayed there for 2 hours. it was good fun. ate too much. drank a little hard alcohol. then we went to tapioca express chilled there for a bit.

saturday, woke up, drove to torrance with raymond. got to tommy's place, and we went to go eat at this peruvian restaurant called "el ricotto". food was great there. tasted pretty much like the el pollo inka dishes, except prepared with fresher ingredients. then i got home, went to 99 ranch with my sister. then went to the korean market with my sister and my mom. then had dinner. ate too much. then met up with tommy, raymond, and tommy's cousin at go go juice (boba 3 days in a row, doh!, at least i caught it). she drove a clk 230. looked nice. she said her parents are paying for it. how nice of them. supposedly her last car was a benz also. we were gonna go see "spirited away" in the theaters but i thought it was gonna agitate my cough breathing in the stale air, so we went somewhere else. then on our way back home, tommy and raymond wanted to get something to eat, so we stopped at Norms. before going in, i told them "better than denny's, not as good as keiths". and they got exactly that. i called home and told my mom that i was just gonna sleep over tommy's place instead cause i still wanted to hang out. so we all went to sleep around 4am, woke up at 10:30, i left at around noon to shower at home and chill with my mom for a bit. ate something small and took a shower. then met up raymond and tommy again at 2, and drove to versailles and had some cuban food. went back to tommy's place and chilled for an hour. before taking off back to SD, i went to go see my dad and mom. even though there were quite a few cars and cops on the road we did manage a 90 minute drive home from gardena. averaged 80+ for sure. that's the play by play for this weekend.

here's the problem with weblogs. the main reason i have been able to keep a journal for this long is because i know that people are reading it. i have tried to keep a personal journal a few years ago, but that lasted about a week. the problem with private personal journals is that it never gets read. it becomes a book on your shelf that you've always say you will read some day, but never get around to. so i feel that writing a personal journal that even i'm never going to read is a waste of my time. the main problem that i've come to realize with weblogs is that you can't freely express yourself. belive me, i try not to censor myself, but if i let loose on my blog, the outcome will definitely not be good. it's not that i have anything bad to say about anyone. that's not what i'm getting at. but some things are better for me to keep to myself. and these things would go on a private journal, not a public one. i'm not sure if this is a catch 22. but there's probably a word for it. there is always the possibility that i can start a web blog with a pseudo-name, but what's the fun in only strangers reading the blog? the best thing about the web blog is giving your friends the opportunity to find out more about you, and keep them updated on what you have been up to. the benefits do outweigh the shortcomings. this is why i continue to write.



other news, i have been helping my friend eddie make his presence on the web about his fight with UCSD graduate school. viewing the case as a third person, i can summarize the problem with UCSD graduate school in a few sentences. if you get on your advisor's bad side, you are shit out of luck. they will lie, exaggerate, and make false claims if you try to challenge their authority because they think they are so important to the school that they can get away with just about anything. and it is unfortunate that this is true. the departments set up to save the students from this happening (because it is very much needed) is a farce. you approach them, and they'll act like they want to help, but ultimately, they are powerless against the almighty professor that is raking in millions of dollars for the university, who also have powerful friends in the university as well. check out the website

walking into the office today, i noticed how obvious the web cam looked from my window. so i decided to hide it, and just my luck that it actually offers a significant improvement for seeing people walking into the building. if i want some more green, i just turn the camera to the left.

i just came back from kmart and picked up beauty and the beast DVD for $15.95. the price is good till the 12th, while supplies last, which I doubt is not much longer than today.



on my drive to kmart, i had the sunroof open and the 2 windows open, and before i knew it, 3 piece of paper basically launched out of my car. i really didn't have a clue on what it was, so i kept driving, and i managed to lean over, and grab the one that didn't fly out. and much to my surprise, it was page one (of 4) serial numbers for all the microsoft products i've found on all the warez sites. and it had my name and email address on each piece of paper in bold. so on my way back from kmart, i tried to look for the papers by circling around and couldn't find it. oh well. it's gone. can't do anything about it.



here is a hilarious commercial:

http://drunkgamers.com/switch0001.shtml

apple is throwing stones while living in a glass house.



on a more serious note, some crazy sniper is on the loose in Washington DC. and he's shooting at men, women, elderly, and children. damn. that's some crazy stuff. can't even comprehend what this guy is up to. he's basically holding the whole state hostage. the playgrounds are clear. starbucks have removed all their outside seating. people are rushing in and out of department stores. just madness.



http://www.signonsandiego.com/news/metro/20021008-9999_1m8racing.html

15 deaths and 20 injuries this year for this country and they are using the word "epidemic"? some epidemic. not defending the muderous idiots responsible, and i'm not trying to imply its not a problem and more people won't die, but c'mon. kfc kills more people every year i bet. you don't see an outcry to stop them from selling its grease. oh don't let me bring up smoking. i won't deal that card.

yesterday, i went to rimac at about 5:45, looked around, and it was a madhouse. and just walked right out. came back at 9, and it was still pretty busy, but managed to get my workout in.



for some reason, it got unusually hot when i got home yesterday. i had to squeeze a nap in between the 2 rimac trips, and it was hard getting up.

okay, i stopped taking hydroxycut on friday, and i've been detoxing ever since. i think the worst thing is the caffine withdrawl. i went from the equivalent of drinking 3 cups of coffee daily for about 3-4 weeks, and then to 0 in the last 3 days, and man, did that make my head spin. i think the storm has passed, but it wasn't pleasant.



ever seen a guy play DDR on Maniac and juggle 3 bowling pins at the same time? prepare to be dazzled

actually, DDR and juggling doesn't mix. now we know. don't waste your time kids.

i went to the usual Pho restaurant at lunch today with jeff.



i was...ah hem.....bleeding the snake when one of the workers comes in the restroom. washes hands really thoroughly. as if he was gonna go wash Jesus's feet right after. so after he's done thoroughly washing his hands, he went to take a leak at the stall. it's my turn to wash my hands, and the guy finishes, and just walks out the door (only one sink). now, what's the deal with that?



today, i helped jeff pick out a new hard drive, and put it in his computer while he detailed my car. i thought it was a good deal. he conditioned my leather and put some touch up paint on my bumper. then washed my car and buffed out some hard water spots. we both agreed it was a great trade of resources.

well, good and bad news. did pretty well in the fitness assessment.

flexibility test 20

step test 106 HR

28 pushups

60 sit up with practically no strain at all

the body fat calipers were having some trouble, and all they wrote down was the measurements



but they freaked when they saw my blood pressure and heart rate (154/80 with 78 bpm) yes i know that's high. i told them i was taking a supplement with ephedra in it and they weren't a big fan of that either. stupid me, if i knew it was gonna read that high, i would have just layed off hydroxycut that day. i've known my bp was elevated the day i started taking it. normally, my cardiovascular health is excellent. and i wouldn't be taking it if i knew it wasn't. i absolutely do not recommend it if your cardio health isn't better than good to begin with. it has the potential to kill. and yes, i think its very possible if you don't follow explicit directions and warnings. i'm taking it for 2 reasons. primary reason is that it gives me a lot more strength in the gym. and it helps burn a little extra fat on the side (i originally bought it for this reason, but i thought the increase in energy was a far better effect). depending on how my talk goes tomorrow with my one on one, i might get off hydroxcut for a while. detox for a few days, and by then i would definitely have used up all my cutting gel. and i can start using yohimburn. ephedra (hydroxycut) and yohimbine (yohimburn) are both CNS stimulants but stimulate it differently and you shouldn't use them together, as it is cautioned on the bottle.



anyway, i have my one on one tomorrow and they're gonna redo my blood pressure tomorrow. it should be back to normal by then.

tomorrow is my fitness assessment day. yay. never felt so ready for a class. not over-prepared, not under-prepared, just right.

today, i met up with jeff and loi to get some pho. loi brought his mustang (he has a few) with a NASCAR racing engine in it. damn that thing was loud. i wasn't really impressed. more mad actually because it sounded like the exact same car that wakes me up at 6 in the morning in international gardens. even though its not loi doing that, i'm just conditioned to it. supposedly it gets 750hp at the wheels, and drives like a normal car if you don't mash the throttle. would it pass smog? well, just standing behind for under a minute, i felt i had lost 2 years of my life. supposedly, loi got bored doing off the line stuff, and wanted a car that could turn. so that's why he's into imports now. rx7's to be exact. he's almost done putting in a big turbo that should give him around 500hp. the funny thing is, the motor that he's doing that to already has a 100,000 miles on it. according to jeff, rotary engines blow up at about 70-80k miles, and need to be replaced. and at rx7 meets, all people talk about is when their engines blew up. anyway, the 100k motor (ready to be blown up any minute) is just a place holder until he can get a new built motor put in by this shop in LA. loi asked jeff if he wanted to come with them to drop the car off in LA. and jeff said no because he didn't want to end up sitting on the side of the freeway with a blown up engine. that was pretty hilarious.



other car related news, jeff's GTR might make an appearance in R&T in the Ampersand section around january. That should be cool. Supposedly, the guy didn't even drive it hard and wasn't even interested. Can't blame him cause he's driven far more exciting vehicles.



the Infiniti G35 Coupe looks really sweet. it's the next perfect car for me. stick, rwd, sophisticated, and 80 more horses at the crack of the whip.... and, it's affordable since my honda retains value really well. oh well, enough about cars....



after that, we went to get boba.......i can never seem to pass that up. oh well. i've been losing more weight than i was hoping. can't hurt when i'm trying to bulk. when i'm cutting up, boba will be my worst enemy. we'll find out when i start cutting up january.



after boba, we went to the nissan dealer to look at the G35 (no coupes there yet), and we went to lexus so jeff can check out a GS430...............yeah. i'll leave it at that. they didn't any any GS430's parked outside, and they were closed, so we just briefly looked at the new ES 300 (car with an interior like Mercedes, and exterior like a corolla), IS300 (doesn't appeal to me any more), and the GS300 (didn't look like anything special). even though jeff's had some influence in my increase in interest towards cars, glad i'm still a big fan of stock. i rely on the engineers to do their job. the biggest mod on my car are wider tires with stiffer side walls about a year ago(Bridgestone Potenza RE730 225/50/16). i read somewhere that if you deflate the tires, it would still stand up. kinda doubt it. anyway, the car rides great. the accord v6 ex trim has really stiff suspension (jeff and nguyen pointed out). i had to change my driving style. and i quickly learned that i couldn't run through the bumpers as i had been doing at IG before.



Track my yohimburn

i did 2 day air shipping because last time i ordered something from Florida by UPS Ground (my receiver), it was 2 weeks of torture, tracking a damn package for 2 weeks as it made its way across the country. i think they just do that, and let you track it to convince you that it's not the way to ship things. i had gotten my speakers first, and it was torture just looking at my speakers for 2 weeks in a box and knowing i couldn't hear them for the first time until i got the receiver. by tomorrow morning, i should have it. unfortunately, the cutting gel just doesn't seem to get used fast enough. but it sure beats having nothing for a week or so.

why do some ideas i have, at the time seem like they're an idea of sheer brilliance and perfection, and then seem like just plain silly when i think of it a month later? i gotta learn how to sort these ideas better. its gonna get me in trouble one day.

i went to rimac today after work around 6:30. warmed up, waited for a bench for like 20 minutes, and just got fed up and went home. i ate at home, and then i went back to rimac around 9:30, to find out not one single cardio machine was open. all elipticals, bikes, treadmills, and stairmasters taken up and 10 more people waiting to get on. it's the freshmen's fault. they only do what they know. who can blame them. we're all the same when we start. i did manage to find a bike in time, did my 8 minutes of warmup for the second time that day, stretched again, and got my monday routine done. today was the hair that broke the camels back. or more like the 500lb man that broke the camels back. i'm gonna start working out tomorrow at lunch until the freshmen realize they can't manage working out and all the time for all the nothing they want to do. according to people that work at rimac, it should die down in about 2 weeks, but still busy, but not crazy and impossible.



i finally got to order yohimburn today. i hope travis still wants a bottle if not, i'll take both. : )



i restarted my computer today and forgot to turn the web cam timershot back on. it's okay though cause there's a new virus out exploiting port 137. not that i need to worry but they are probably watching traffic on that port, so i got lucky.